by Lorraine Gibson
A moving but joyous true story about the life of a boy with Down Syndrome and profound learning disabilities is all the more poignant as it’s told through his eyes – by his mother.
Hazel Morgan reflects with love, humour and thankfulness on her late son Pete’s teenage years and the challenges they faced as a family.
“Back in 1990, I wrote about Pete’s childhood in a book called Through Peter’s Eyes – written from his perspective.
“I wanted this new book to show his positive influence as a young man – who never used words – on those around him and the joy he created in our lives”
I ask Hazel about the touching friendship between Pete, who died at 18, and his brother, Philip.
“Philip was nearly three years older than Pete and they went to different schools. He would greet Pete when he came in with a high five and when he could drive, Philip would take him out in our car as he loved going for rides.
“He’d look out for him. On holiday in Scotland as teenagers when they were in the small swimming pool, despite loud protests from me, Philip removed Pete’s arm bands saying:
‘You can swim.’
“He was right.”
Planting an anniversary tree in Pete’s memory, among the many things Philip recalled were ‘his happy noises, his grumbling noises, his abilities of persuasion, waving goodbye’.
He says: “Pete did not have words, I don’t think there are words to describe his special qualities that managed to have such an impact on those around him.”
Hazel says: “Of course there were times when life was challenging, but when I look back I can count the 18 years spent with Pete among the richest of my life as we shared the enjoyment of celebrations, outings, picnics, friendships, and, above all, music. We shared love, sadness and happiness.”
She highlights Pete’s charm: “A friend, Wendy, met Pete at a club for disabled children run by her mother. She and two of her friends would come to see Pete after school and spend time with him.
“He entertained the three girls for a birthday tea when he was 16.”
Hazel is involved with People First Dorset, run by people with learning disabilities with support from a small team of staff.
The organisation’s vision is that adults with learning disabilities are treated equally, listened to and included in community life.
Members meet up across Dorset, making friends through Friendship Club events and a Speaking Up project that enables them to speak up and talk about issues important to them.
“I have been told the book is useful to teachers and other professionals as it helps them to understand the joys and challenges of families with young people who have profound and multiple learning disabilities,” says Hazel.
“As Pete never used words, it gives insights into each person’s unique ways of communicating. “A parent in a similar situation told me it was helpful to them to read Pete’s story and find common ground.”
The Joy of Knowing Pete: Much was said, yet no words spoken YouCaxton (youcaxton.co.uk/pete)
From bookshops and Amazon. £11.99.
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